Tag Archives: About Me

Thoughts on {Extroverts and Introverts}

I’ve read a few articles recently about this introvert/extrovert, let’s say, debate. Most articles from the introvert’s perspective, or a “how to” when interacting with a self-proclaimed introvert. But loudly, as extroverts usually do, the responses and rebuttals are quickly making an appearance in social media.

So, why not weigh in, here are a few of my thoughts on this topic.

On the continuum of painfully shy, timid, unable to converse with people to the loud, obnoxious, talk to anyone, I would put myself quite firmly on the extrovert side. I realize this is both a personality trait, and a personal choice.

I do realize that introvert is not synonymous with quiet or shy. Nor should extrovert have the same definition as loud or obnoxious.

There is a certain disdain towards extroverts’ communication styles, with words such as shallow, pithy, empty, meaningless often thrown in as the key adjectives. This may or may not be true for some extroverts, but can I just point out one minor thing? How do you get to know someone without talking? I can hear it already, “Small talk isn’t communication.” False. (insert Dwight’s face) You learn something from every conversation, well you can learn something from every conversation. It just depends if you’re looking. Discussing the seemingly “small things of life” can show priorities, goals, values, as well as provide insight into the person’s way of thinking. Discussing my junior high girls’ favorite pop group or movie can give huge understanding to a group’s dynamics or priorities. You just have to be alert during these “meaningless” conversations to grasp the real meat of the discussion.

Extroverts are often labeled as conversational hogs or attention seekers. But, pause for a moment, someone has to start the conversation. Starting a conversation, even with seemingly “meaningless” topics, is important to relationships. It shows interest, it allows others to give opinions, thoughts on the topic. You don’t normally just jump into a deep conversation with a random person. But how does asking, “Where did you get that scarf” open a conversation? Leads to discussion of places to shop, deals found, favorite items, colors, etc. Bits and pieces of information used to keep the conversation going. Now can you have a friendship with someone and not know their favorite color? Of course. Taking the time to learn about people, to know information, to many, this may seem inconsequential. But I would argue this, spending the time to learn about someone else,  that shows interest, and gives value to that person beyond just a face in the crowd.

I love my generation’s attempt to label everything, but always attempting to be different, unique. We’re programmed with this need to stand out from the crowd.  But in this desperate need to be someone or make something of ourselves, we have lost what it means to be a friend. We network, we use people, we learn what we need to know to get by. Be different, learn someone’s favorite color, ask about the small things in life, not just the obvious or surface”y” topics. Obviously this goes both for introverts, as well as extroverts. But sometimes an extrovert feels rejected or hurt when an introvert does not express any interest in learning about them. Sharing is a natural thing for an extrovert, so introverts can be perceived as rude if this same interest is not returned.

Extroverts may not open up easily. Yes, I hear your thoughts “they’re actually WAY to open” but pause again. Self-proclaimed extrovert moment, we use shallow topics to build up friendships to slowly open up on other more meaningful topics.

Bear in mind, I am speaking in generalities. Don’t be offended, these are just observations and personal feelings.

Introverts claim the corner on self-reflective thought and soul searching. I disagree. As an extrovert, I am often reflecting on my behaviors, words, actions. But some difference may occur in that as I reflect on all that is me, I am also analyzing how this interacts with others. How does it make them feel? Am I coming across rude because I don’t start a conversation? Am I coming across shallow because I compliment their outfit? The pressure to entertain, amuse, keep the conversation going is something an extrovert knows well.

I’ll review a conversation multiple times in my head to see where it went wrong, or when the “I’m overwhelmed” face appeared. I would bet that many self-proclaimed extroverts also have these same experiences.

Of course we are human, and all very selfish in our interactions. Selfishness can be seen all across this spectrum. So learn about people different from you, have the pithy conversations, engage in the deep discussions, remember, this life is not all about you.

So these are a few of a self-proclaimed extrovert’s thoughts. Take them as you will. I’m interested to know your thoughts on this topic.

 

Advertisements
Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

{Trust}

image

 

“Sarah, do you Trust Me?”

“Of course I do” I hurried to reassure Him

The blunt response came loud & clear,

{Then Live Like It}

OUCH

Do I live like I Trust? What does a life of Trust look like?

If I trust a chair do I only partially sit down? Nope, I plop right down & put my whole weight on it. If I am seeking advice from a trusted friend, do I only tell them half of the story? No, I confide in them all the details, trusting that they will give me the best advice.

Do I truly Trust God? Do I allow Him to lead me?

Do I spend my time worrying & fearing the future?

{Trust} 

Not an easy lesson to learn, not an easy lesson to practice.

Trust:: practice it daily

{Live Like It} 

Tagged , , , , , , , , ,

Something More

IMG_20121111_073916

Is a journal just a diary? A sad hand-written pathetic book filled with life secrets?

Or is it something more?

I’ve always viewed my journal as so much more. A place to record fears and doubts–a place to write out the struggles and the triumphs. Writing causes clarity, quiets the mind, pauses for reflection.

When I look back over my past journal entries I see God’s hand displayed in my life. I see His strength, His goodness, and His love. The plans start to make sense, the path becomes clear–God knew all along.

But if these moments, these fears, these doubts, are never recorded…how will we remember? How will I remind myself of the truth when the pain and the struggles return? Truths that God does not abandon us, Truths that God has a plan, Truths that God is in control.

~a journal is so much more~ 

Tagged , ,

From IDK to IK

{Pardon the text lingo}

As a student nurse I found myself often using the phrase, I don’t know. You’re being taught, people are always telling you why and how to fix the problem. Obviously this is expected (it’s what I was paying for right?) and it gradually transitions and the pieces start to fall into place, but I still use the phrase IDK frequently!

But now…I am a Real Nurse (RN for short), and the phrase IDK needs to be removed from my vocabulary. The problem is there, how do we solve it, what should I be looking at? I may not have all the answers, but I need to be transitioning into I Know where to look. Enough of the deer-in-headlights response, I am a nurse, I can solve this problem.

And it’s not just in nursing this applies. There are situations that arise and seeking advice is not wrong, but am I seeking advice or someone to pass the problem onto? I’ve gotta step up & deal with the problems on my own. I’ve experienced a full (*23*) years and have seen others go through things, so it’s time for me to start saying, IK what to do!

{IK} 

Tagged , , , , , , ,

So Now What?!

The ceremonies are over, the parties are done, the presents and cards are opened and the thank you notes are written {well almost}

So the question that arises is “So Now What?!” 

The end of yet another leg of the journey. The temptation for the “Let Down” is strong.

Do I just jump in and start making goals and plans? Do I take some time off and relax?

Start a new Bible study? Continue to study for the state board test? Start a new exercise routine? Start crossing items off my bucket list?

I look at all the possibilities and I can’t wait!

I have such plans for my teens, for my room, for my personal sanity.

So how do I combat the let down??

Enjoy everyday. Look to encourage all those who cross my path. Make plans & carry them out.

Tagged , , ,

Why Blog?

Why Blog? This was a question I forced myself to answer before embarking on this adventure. So why start a blog? Because I want to hear my own thoughts? Because a friend told me I should? Because I want my name out in the blog land? Skmusings was started as a place for me to share publically what I am learning and experiencing on life’s journey. But 1 Corinthians 10:31 must always be kept in mind, whatever I do MUST be for the Glory of God! Skmusings strives to be a God-honoring and semi-interesting blog. J

So About Me: (wow that sounds selfish)

What are the first 5 words that pop into your head that describes you? When I tried this I came up with loyal, laughter, caring, sarcastic, and planner. Now I don’t know how accurate this can be because obviously my mind was already working on the answer, but I think those five words do show was I would like to be. In the words of the prideful Mr. Darcy “my good opinion once lost is lost forever,” I like to think I’m the other way around, once you’ve gained my respect –you’re in, loyal almost to a fault. I love to laugh, in fact I probably laugh too much, but I claim it burns calories and is therefore very beneficial. As to the caring, a nursing student must be caring, kind, and compassionate, and I strive to give every patient Christ-like care. I am very sarcastic and in this vanilla pudding Midwestern Town the sarcasm is a claim to fame. In a recent anonymous survey it was decided by the majority of responses that I am sarcastic and make lots of ridiculous comments, awesome. This is probably why I love writing because I can say what’s on my mind and I have time to ponder how to word it appropriately. Obviously the rules do not apply to my speech. Do you ever sit and ask yourself where you want to be in five year? How about 10 years? Next week? I am constantly planning my life, but planning often is more in the vague form of dreaming. (Something which in upcoming posts will be addressed.) So that is a brief overview of who I am. Enjoy reading my musings and please leave comments and discussions!

Tagged