Tag Archives: life

Thoughts on {Extroverts and Introverts}

I’ve read a few articles recently about this introvert/extrovert, let’s say, debate. Most articles from the introvert’s perspective, or a “how to” when interacting with a self-proclaimed introvert. But loudly, as extroverts usually do, the responses and rebuttals are quickly making an appearance in social media.

So, why not weigh in, here are a few of my thoughts on this topic.

On the continuum of painfully shy, timid, unable to converse with people to the loud, obnoxious, talk to anyone, I would put myself quite firmly on the extrovert side. I realize this is both a personality trait, and a personal choice.

I do realize that introvert is not synonymous with quiet or shy. Nor should extrovert have the same definition as loud or obnoxious.

There is a certain disdain towards extroverts’ communication styles, with words such as shallow, pithy, empty, meaningless often thrown in as the key adjectives. This may or may not be true for some extroverts, but can I just point out one minor thing? How do you get to know someone without talking? I can hear it already, “Small talk isn’t communication.” False. (insert Dwight’s face) You learn something from every conversation, well you can learn something from every conversation. It just depends if you’re looking. Discussing the seemingly “small things of life” can show priorities, goals, values, as well as provide insight into the person’s way of thinking. Discussing my junior high girls’ favorite pop group or movie can give huge understanding to a group’s dynamics or priorities. You just have to be alert during these “meaningless” conversations to grasp the real meat of the discussion.

Extroverts are often labeled as conversational hogs or attention seekers. But, pause for a moment, someone has to start the conversation. Starting a conversation, even with seemingly “meaningless” topics, is important to relationships. It shows interest, it allows others to give opinions, thoughts on the topic. You don’t normally just jump into a deep conversation with a random person. But how does asking, “Where did you get that scarf” open a conversation? Leads to discussion of places to shop, deals found, favorite items, colors, etc. Bits and pieces of information used to keep the conversation going. Now can you have a friendship with someone and not know their favorite color? Of course. Taking the time to learn about people, to know information, to many, this may seem inconsequential. But I would argue this, spending the time to learn about someone else,  that shows interest, and gives value to that person beyond just a face in the crowd.

I love my generation’s attempt to label everything, but always attempting to be different, unique. We’re programmed with this need to stand out from the crowd.  But in this desperate need to be someone or make something of ourselves, we have lost what it means to be a friend. We network, we use people, we learn what we need to know to get by. Be different, learn someone’s favorite color, ask about the small things in life, not just the obvious or surface”y” topics. Obviously this goes both for introverts, as well as extroverts. But sometimes an extrovert feels rejected or hurt when an introvert does not express any interest in learning about them. Sharing is a natural thing for an extrovert, so introverts can be perceived as rude if this same interest is not returned.

Extroverts may not open up easily. Yes, I hear your thoughts “they’re actually WAY to open” but pause again. Self-proclaimed extrovert moment, we use shallow topics to build up friendships to slowly open up on other more meaningful topics.

Bear in mind, I am speaking in generalities. Don’t be offended, these are just observations and personal feelings.

Introverts claim the corner on self-reflective thought and soul searching. I disagree. As an extrovert, I am often reflecting on my behaviors, words, actions. But some difference may occur in that as I reflect on all that is me, I am also analyzing how this interacts with others. How does it make them feel? Am I coming across rude because I don’t start a conversation? Am I coming across shallow because I compliment their outfit? The pressure to entertain, amuse, keep the conversation going is something an extrovert knows well.

I’ll review a conversation multiple times in my head to see where it went wrong, or when the “I’m overwhelmed” face appeared. I would bet that many self-proclaimed extroverts also have these same experiences.

Of course we are human, and all very selfish in our interactions. Selfishness can be seen all across this spectrum. So learn about people different from you, have the pithy conversations, engage in the deep discussions, remember, this life is not all about you.

So these are a few of a self-proclaimed extrovert’s thoughts. Take them as you will. I’m interested to know your thoughts on this topic.

 

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You Simply MUST Do

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For my class I had to read the book 9 Things You Simply Must Do to Succeed in Love and Life By Dr. Henry Cloud

These are a few of my thoughts and hopefully they will encourage you to take the time to read this fabulous book.

He starts out by defining Deja vu people as “People who found what they were looking for in life” and that these people had specific traits in common. None of these people had the same background, they were from all walks of life, upbringings varied, which encourages us that these things can be learned, we are not stuck. We can learn from these people and become successful.

He then proceeds to give us 9 Principles or word pictures based on the actions of successful people he has met and interacted with.

Since there are several of them that impacted me deeply, I will divide them up so you don’t have a novel to dig through, so to start:

Principle #1

Dig it up: Find your heart’s desire. Find that combination of interest and what lays deeply buried in your heart. So often we become distracted or lose that which makes us “come alive”–I firmly believe that God has given us all talents that must be used, and when we neglect them we lose the purpose for life. Find it, act on it, invest in it, hold on to it, fight for it. Do not ignore your heart, mind, and soul…Do not allow for it to be buried in the busyness of life.

Awesome quote “Those who take what they possess, invest it in life, and are diligent and faithful with it over time, grow and build something good. But those who allow fear to keep them from stepping out, not only fail to increase what they have, they actually lose it” 

I challenge you, search your heart, when you are feeling discontent and frustrated, seek those things you have buried away. We were created for a purpose and we must not neglect to use the talents and skills, passions that were given to us.

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Monday::Inspiration

I love CyberMonday, you know the Monday after Black Friday? The day where most stores offer free shipping or online deals. I just get drawn in! Probably because I’m working all weekend so Cyber Monday is my own personal Christmas! Do you enjoy shopping? I sure do! I love buying just the right gift for someone, the perfect item to make them smile. 

Ah {Sigh} CyberMonday is a joy to me.

The CyberMonday bug has bitten me again…I’ve found that every Monday I am either shopping, planning trips, or job searching…Why does Monday cause this craziness?

Since I’ve been done with school and entered the “real” world (since of course college is not real…) Monday has become this day that is often spent dreaming and planning.

{I look up new non-profit groups to be a part of

{I find new causes to be passionate about:: Ask me about Human Trafficking, Abortion, or numerous other health care related issues

{I plan trips. Two Mondays ago I bought a ticket to PA and a few hours later a ticket to Texas. My Kayak alert is set for both Seattle, San Diego, and San Fran right now.

{I shop. I order books, kitchen oddities, clothes, phone cases (that’s my weakness!) and I could go on…but I shop online…quite a bit.

Maybe I just want Monday’s to be NEW.

Fresh.

A fresh start to the week?

Yes that’s it.

Something New to celebrate the start of a New week.

A Fresh [passion] or {Inspiration} for the week ahead.

O monday…

Well I better get to researching (aka shopping)

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::That Moment

::That dreadful moment, the terrifying, adrenaline rushing moment when your Patient goes unresponsive.

::That heart-dropping, stressful moment when you open your e-mail to a read of an error that occurred on your watch

::That awful moment when your brain is so foggy you don’t know what to do, you flounder as you search for the next step

All moments that leave lasting memories.

But we grow & learn from these moments. I’ve been told by many people that starting a new job is stressful. The first year as an RN is a year of learning. But being told something & experiencing it for yourself are two very different things.

The stress will continue but it cannot weigh you down. Confidence is gained from intense situations done right, but just as important, situations gone wrong can grow us, stretch us, and leave lasting impacts on our lives.

As I reach the end of my first year as an RN, I look back & see how far I have come. Situations I never thought I could handle I can. Things I used to balk at have become second nature. But there is much more to go. Lessons to be learned, tasks to be accomplished, knowledge to be gained, all come from experiences, both good & bad.

::That wonderful, confidence building moment when you catch a new heart rhythm

::That tearful, tender moment when  you really connect with a patient & are able to encourage them

::That awesome, inspiring moment when you realize…I am a Nurse.

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Do you ever hear a phrase that just jumps out at you? A powerful combination of together that strung together express your vision or feeling.

Today just such a phrase jumped out at me.

::communicate hope::

am I daily communicating hope to those around me?

How does one communicate hope?

To understand this I think of love hopes all things from 1 Corinthians 13:7

hope:: does not allow the failure to be final

hope:: allows us to look forward, to get up & to move on

Hope is a powerful emotion, an outlook on life, a glimpse at a better tomorrow.

What are you hopeful for?

Why do you have hope?

Who are you communicating this valuable lesson to?

 

Hope Communicates 

Hope Communicates

Failure is not the end

Hope Communicates

Get up, Move on

Hope Communicates

There is a better future

 

The sorrows of life, they

drag us down

The storms, the trials,

all surround us

 

We Fall, We Fail

But we Rise up Again

 

Hope Communicates

Failure is Not the end

 

 

Communicate Hope

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Follow Up:: Trust

Proverbs 3:1-7

My son, do not forget my teaching,
but let your heart keep my commandments,
for length of days and years of life
and peace they will add to you.

Let not steadfast love and faithfulness forsake you;
bind them around your neck;
write them on the tablet of your heart.
So you will find favor and good success
in the sight of God and man.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart,
and do not lean on your own understanding.
In all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will make straight your paths.
Be not wise in your own eyes;
fear the Lord, and turn away from evil.

 

This passage says so much about a life of Trust. When we keep the commandments, when we are living a Spirit controlled life, we a trusting God. His Steadfast love & faithfulness should be my meditation.

Verses 5, 6, & 7 are “classic” trust verses, but do not underestimate the power they contain.

Trust, Acknowledge, Turn –all actions that we must be living out in a life a trust.

::TRUST:: 

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{Trust}

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“Sarah, do you Trust Me?”

“Of course I do” I hurried to reassure Him

The blunt response came loud & clear,

{Then Live Like It}

OUCH

Do I live like I Trust? What does a life of Trust look like?

If I trust a chair do I only partially sit down? Nope, I plop right down & put my whole weight on it. If I am seeking advice from a trusted friend, do I only tell them half of the story? No, I confide in them all the details, trusting that they will give me the best advice.

Do I truly Trust God? Do I allow Him to lead me?

Do I spend my time worrying & fearing the future?

{Trust} 

Not an easy lesson to learn, not an easy lesson to practice.

Trust:: practice it daily

{Live Like It} 

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{Attitude}You Decide

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Warning Warning:: Foul Mood Alert

Don’t you wish there were days you could hang this sign up or wear a t-shirt that warned everyone…Stay Away, I’m incredibly cranky & may potentially bite your head off.

But unfortunately….Your attitude is something you decide.

When you get out of bed, you put on the attitude you want for the day.

Cranky ::I can choose to be grateful

Sad ::I can choose to rejoice in the goodness of the Lord

Sensitive ::I can choose to give people the benefit of the doubt

Negative ::I can choose to look at all that I have & be thankful

Worried ::I can choose to trust that the Savior holds my future

Frustrated ::I can choose to walk in the Spirit & allow Him to guide my actions

Whatever the “feelings” of the day are telling me to believe, I know that I have the Ultimate Source for Truth.

I can be confident in my identity in Christ.

My foul attitude is not a death sentence, for bad moods come. My foul attitude is a challenge, a trial, a chance to focus on the Truth & to change it.

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Lack of Inspiration

I’ve started about 20 blog posts….none of which have made it through the final draft.  I’ve started to write about several topics, all of which fizzled to nothing…

{SIGH}

“Writing is a struggle against silence.” – Carlos Fuentes

This is a struggle I am losing, and to be honest, not one I am even used to struggling with.

Well this I know…

{Inspiration will come} 

not when I will it, but it will come

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Travel Abroad: Poland

One year ago yesterday I embarked on an overseas adventure that tested my attitude, challenged my strength, & broadened my world view. And today, I sit here in the Warsaw airport awaiting the next adventure.

There is something in my heart that longs to travel.

Hence the year of {wanderlust}

I wish I had some profound wisdom or insight on why travel is exciting, but the only thing I can come up with is

::Adventure:: 

Adventure of the unknown

Sitting at the feet of missionaries and other, listening to the talk of travels, adventures, and trials, I knew that I wanted to join this band of courageous people. Always seeking to understand, looking at other cultures, not to criticize, but to learn & understand. 

I don’t have a great revelation or shocking thoughts on Poland.

The food was phenomenal, the culture interesting, the historical sites moving, and of course I loved the family I stayed with.

What did I learn: Faith keeps the Family strong in Poland. The Polish people work hard, as a general rule they do not go into debt & live within their means. Often a young married couple will live with family for several years until able to afford to build a house for themselves.

Overall a fabulous & lovely trip. Minimal jet lag, wonderful touristy moments combined with more traditional experiences, shopping, building friendships, and another stamp in my Passport.

At Krakowski Rynek

At Krakowski Rynek

 

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